Most people today are busy and stressed. They work all day long, and yet still can’t seem to get ahead. It is so frustrating to feel underwater– especially when your health and mental well-being are at stake. Finding balance isn’t easy. In any given season, we may find ourselves overworked. During especially intense periods, it’s important to know how to avoid getting burned out. To help sustain you during times of pressure, consider these three “R’s.”
Everyone Needs Rest
The other day, I was sitting on the beach watching a large bird overhead. I noticed it would flap its wings a few times and then glide for awhile. Flap and glide. Flap and glide. Neither of these actions alone could keep the bird in flight. It was the combination of the two that made flight possible.
So it is with us. If we work and work but never glide, we will eventually be exhausted. Hard work is important, but it can’t be constant. Too much flapping eventually leads to diminished motivation, sloppy work, illness, bitterness, impatience, or even depression.
Rest allows us to stop flapping long enough to recover our strength.
We Need Refreshment, Not Distraction
Refreshment restores our energy by actively engaging our minds and bodies, rather than numbing them.
In today’s world of endless technological entertainment, it’s easy to escape the worries of the day. We turn on the TV, pull out the iPad, surf social media, play a video game–the list goes on. These activities are distractions. Because they are passive, we think of them as relaxation, but they aren’t truly restorative. They simply shift our focus from stressful thoughts to mundane ones.
There is nothing inherently wrong with these activities. We all need to “zone out” sometimes. However, distraction doesn’t have the power to truly refresh us. Have you ever walked away from an hour online and thought, “Wow, I feel so energized now?” True refreshment is more likely to come from:
- Activities that require physical exertion (e.g., exercise)
- Creative endeavors (e.g., hobbies)
- Listening to or creating music
- Human interaction (e.g., socializing)
- Rest (e.g., a nap)
- Cooking
- Engaging with nature
- Meditation, prayer, and deep breathing
These pursuits stimulate areas of our brains responsible for rebuilding, restoring, and renewing. For example, repetitive hand movements and rhythmic actions (like knitting or painting) can induce something called a “flow state.” This is a pleasurable psychological state in which we become so engaged that time seems to disappear. Entering a flow state can be deeply refreshing.
These activities also signal our bodies to produce more dopamine and serotonin—the “feel-good” hormones.
Refreshing activities don’t reduce your workload, but they can help you feel calmer and happier. Remember, the goal isn’t to make your brain ignore your problems, but rather to give your mind and body a break so that you can put your challenges in perspective. Refreshment doesn’t eliminate pressure, but it equips us to handle it with greater clarity and resilience.
Rhythm is Calming and Empowering
Chaotic days make us feel out of control. Instead of following a plan with intention, we end up reacting to whatever screams the loudest. This approach is often unproductive, discouraging, and draining. Occasional days like this are unavoidable. But when this become your norm, it is time to rethink your system. Rhythm creates a steady, predictable pattern that reduces mental strain and increases follow-through.
Planning is a powerful tool in the fight against overwhelm. The purpose of planning is to insert as much predictability as possible into your day. A good plan clarifies how and where you intend to spend your time. Admittedly, some people have more time than others. If you primarily care for yourself, your plan may include a long list of objectives. If you are a busy mom with young children, your plan may involve repeating the same tasks day after day, with only small windows for anything extra. A good plan isn’t defined by length or complexity, but by achievability.
Accomplishing your plan requires focus and follow-through. It also helps to add predictability and rhythm to your schedule. When you create rhythm in your schedule, you brain clicks into gear more quickly, easing task initiation. Rhythm simply means operating in patterns your brain learns to expect.
For example, assign repetitive tasks to specific days of the week (e.g., laundry on Mondays, grocery shopping on Fridays, filing on Thursdays, etc.). Another is to establish time blocks for specific types tasks, such as:
- 1/2 hour of daily desk time in the morning to process email
- One hour in the afternoon to run errands
- 20 minutes after dinner to reset your space
- An hour once a week to work on house projects
- 30 minutes on Sunday evenings to meet with family members and review the week ahead.
A third way to add rhythm is by adjusting your environment to suit different tasks. For instance:
- Turning on instrumental music when we need to sit down and focus.
- Moving to a specific seat or room when we need to perform a specific task.
- Pairing established tasks with new ones we want to work on.
- Altering the lighting in a space to get us ready to perform.
- Using alarms and reminders that instantly let us know it is time to perform a task.
Rhythm is familiar and comforting. When we operate within a rhythm, we feel more secure and confident. Routines also helps us pivot and adapt when life’s complexities hit. When rhythm is built into our days, progress becomes more sustainable and stress becomes more manageable.
* * *
Life is more of a marathon than a sprint. Rest replenishes our strength, refreshment renews our energy, and rhythm sustains our momentum. Together, these Three R’s provide fuel for our minds, bodies, and spirits.
How do you avoid getting burned out?
The impact of reliable routines help helps us keep energized. Well, this might seem boring. It also helps us keep up with every day task and keep life manageable. Because of this, we keep from being burnt out.
Yes, that predictability keeps us from getting burned out because we know when the breaks are coming!
Your message is essential. No one can go, go, go without refilling the cup.
I love your “flap and glide” image! It’s such a beautiful and powerful analogy. If you want to fly, you can’t just flap. You also have to give space to glide. That’s so true. It’s taken time, but I’ve figured out different ways to glide. Now if I could only figure out how to actually fly, that would be amazing. 🙂
The distinction you made for “refreshment” was a good one, too. Those things we think of as refreshing, are more brain-numbing than restorative. So focusing on the activities you mentioned will be more beneficial.
Your idea about rhythm and how that relates to planning is also a wonderful concept. It’s one I haven’t heard before and it resonates. It’s kind of like having a minimal wardrobe where you don’t have to spend a lot of time thinking about what to wear. It’s easier to get dressed because you know what to expect. Considering time in that way makes a lot of sense too.
Terrific, thought-provoking post!
I’m still thinking about the “flap and glide.” Nobody teaches birds this principle, but they know it instinctually. I think we know it as well, but we behave as if we don’t. We let external pressures speak louder into our lives than our instincts. Thanks for all the affirming words, Linda!
This is a beautiful message< Seana. I love your analogies and the pictures they brought to my mind. I completely relate to all three of your Rs.
I tend to be more like the energizer bunny and go,go,go until I can't go any longer. I have begun to incorporate more defined breaks into my day and week because I am learning that I don't always need to be "on".
I am a huge believer in exercise and, as you know, rhythm. I work out, walk the dog several times a day, and dance regularly – all these things allow my mind to relax. I find that I sometimes come up with really great solutions while I'm involved in one of these activities.
I am a big believer in creating routines. Routines provide a terrific foundation (as you put it a rhythm) for the day. Whether you switch routines depending on the day or have morning and evening routines to follow, they are great to rely on.
I love how you come up with great ideas when pursuing recreational activities. I am such a believer in this principle! It is when we relax that are mind starts making connections across regions of our brain, coming up with new thoughts. The trick is to capture those when they pop up, because it sure can be hard to come up with great ideas on demand!
I love the flap and glide image. It helps planning restorative break time as a necessity instead of just a treat.
I am guilty of using social media as a break when I just don’t want to even think enough to read. Maybe I should rethink that automatic “rest” and look at meditation or a phone call to a friend.
Great stuff!
I’m still pondering the “flap and glide” analogy. It really struck me at the time. So much instinctual wisdom there!
You make some really good points here! When my workload feels overwhelming, I tend to avoid taking time out for a walk or other activity I don’t consider productive, but truth be told, that’s when I need it the most! Starting my day with a walk might mean a later start time, but it means I’m going to my desk energized, so I tend to get more done and with more enthusiasm. It’s even possible that the later start time leads me to work more efficiently!
Getting those self-care times in makes the whole day more efficient. I find my early morning rituals are vital to showing up with my “best self” too!
Seana, I love your nature analogies! Flap and glide — this one reminds me of the old Girl Scout’s Pace: Run 20 steps, walk 20 steps. (I looked it up. The number of steps varies, and Robert Baden-Powell, who created Boy Scouts, is credited.) The idea is to cover ground quickly without getting exhausted. It works!
I don’t think I ever heard of that run 20, walk 20, even though I was a Girl Scout! It’s the same idea, right? Same idea as interval workouts. We need the mix of activity. Thanks for telling me about that!
Great tips for avoiding burnout. From personal experience, I had to redefine my priorities and goals, and what I wanted my life to be like. I began to realize that some things were not as important as I thought, and I started stopping those tasks to make room for the ones I truly value and that I felt would improve my and my family’s lifestyle. Thanks for sharing.
It’s sort of a lightbulb moment to realize that some things we have been doing, perhaps for years, are no longer terribly important. Momentum can keep us in routines that no longer serve us. Same with our physical belongings, right? As you say, it’s all about finding what we truly value.
I definitely find his to be true of knitting. it is a rhythmic activity. Finding time to do it is a problem when I’m really busy because I tend to think it’s not important, but you just helped me to realize it is important for my emotional health.
I understand that emotion, Dianne. We can denigrate the importance of these types of self-care because they feel indulgent. But as you say, they truly are important!
Oh, Seana, this is the magic. I’m stealing (with credit) “flap and glide” because it’s such a vivid metaphor! I also love your distinction between distraction vs. refreshment, though I will tell you that after I watch an hour of giggling baby and adorable toddler videos on TikTok for an hour, I definitely feel refreshed. 😉
I wish I’d read your post this morning before I worked with my client, because we were having a conversation about how no matter much you plan, action precedes motivation and not, as is often assumed, the reverse. I love how you talked about task initiation being easier when you get into a rhythm, because that was exactly what I was trying to get across. People fear that having specific times and places for doing things will put them into a rut. Not true. Ritual and rhythm Rule!
Great post!
I also run into a lot of people who feel a routine will be a rut. In fact, it is just the opposite. The routine frees your mind (and body) to perform without a lot of mental energy, which frees your energy for other pursuits. It’s easier to be spontaneous when you have a routine, which sounds silly, but it is true!