The Ultimate Guide to Hosting a Happy Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving — don’t you love it? More food than you can eat, no gift-giving obligations, a holiday all Americans can share, a day to focus on what we have instead of what we don’t, and permission to nap. What’s not to love? For the most part, I agree. Of course, for those hosting the feast, it can also be stressful — there’s a lot to plan, coordinate, and pull off. To help you not just survive but thrive, here is my ultimate guide to hosting a happy Thanksgiving.

Before Thanksgiving Week:

The biggest key to hosting a successful Thanksgiving feast is to plan ahead — ideally before Thanksgiving week begins. Here are some things to decide and get done well in advance.

Make Hospitality Decisions

• Who will sleep where? Do you need to purchase or borrow air mattresses?
• What towels will everyone use and which bathrooms will they use?
• What supplies do you need to stock up on? (toilet paper, toothbrushes, shampoo, coffee, etc.)
• What pillows and blankets will each guest use?
• How will guests arrive at your home? Do they need an airport pick up?
• Are guests bringing babies or children? Is special equipment needed, such as cribs or high chairs?
• Is there space in the closet for their clothes? Do you need to empty out drawers and/or add a few empty hangers? 

Decide on Your Menu

• What will you make?
• What will others bring?
• Do any guests have dietary restrictions you’ll need to accommodate?
• What will you serve to drink? Do you need to buy extra ice?
• What time will you serve dinner?
• Will you serve appetizers? If so, which ones and when?
• Do you need to get any condiments that you don’t normally use but guests might want?
• Will you offer coffee & tea with dessert? Do you have enough sugar/sweetener/creamers?
• When will you cook each dish? (write down the day & time for each one)

Plan the Physical Layout

Entryway and Receiving

• Who will answer the door?
• Where will guests put their coats when they arrive?
• Where will guests put the food they bring? (ideally somewhere away from the cooking zone)

Cocktail and Gathering Time

• Where will guests gather before the meal?
• Where will you set up the bar? What will you include (corkscrew, bottle opener, ice bucket, drink markers, etc.)? Will it be self-serve, or will someone manage refills?
• Will you have a fire in a fireplace? Who will tend this? Do you need to buy wood?
• Will you take a group photo before the meal? Who will take it, when and where?

Dining Plan

• Where will guests sit to eat dinner? Do you need to set up extra tables and/or add in table leaves?
• Will you serve from a buffet or at the table?
• What will be your seating plan? Will you assign seating? Will there be a separate children’s table?
• Do you need trivets and/or table pads?
• Do you need a side table or extra serving surface in the dining room?

Food Staging

• Do you need extra cold storage (e.g. a cooler or outside fridge)?
• Will the turkey be carved in advance or at the table? Do you need a special knife?
• Where will dessert be served?
• Where will you set up the coffee/tea? Will it be self-serve?

Non-Food Activities

• Will you play music during the day? If so, what?
• Will there be football viewing? If so, where and when?
• Where will you collect trash? Do you need extra receptacles? How about for recyclables? 

Design Your Table(s)

• Will you use a tablecloth and/or placemats? How about a runner?
• Will you use chargers or other decorative dishes?
• Will you use china, daily dishes or paper and plastic?
• Which silverware will you use? Does anything need to be cleaned or polished? [Note: it is is handy to have a separate set of silverware strictly for entertaining so you aren’t trying to empty the dishwasher at the last minute]
• Which glasses will you have on the table (and which at the bar)? [Note: when setting a formal table with glasses, working from the center to the right, the order is water, red wine, white wine]
• Which napkins will you use? Will you use napkin rings?
• Which salt and pepper shakers will you use? (place shakers at both ends if you have a long table)
• How will you serve butter/olive oil for bread?
• What will be your centerpiece? (flowers, cornucopia, garland, holiday decorations, etc.)
• Which candles and candleholders will you use? [Note: you can supplement real candles with battery-operated flameless candles to minimize risk of fire on a busy day.]
• Will you use place cards? If so, what kind? [Note: this can be a great project for little ones who are underfoot.]
• Which serving dishes/platters and utensils will you use for each dish? [Tip: it is helpful to put a note in/on each dish to remind yourself of what food item should go where during the last minute rush.]

Begin Early Preparations (One to Two Weeks Out)

• Polish silver
• Clean crystal
• Iron table linens
• Clean the oven (Thanksgiving tends to bring curious onlookers)
• Decide what you will wear (and make sure it is clean)
• Buy all shelf stable items and paper products
• Buy wine/liquor/champagne/seltzer/soda/etc.
• Prep food that can be made in advance
• Set up a playlist to run during the day

Early Thanksgiving Week:

Thanksgiving week gets busy fast, especially if you have houseguests arriving. Start the week strong by:

• Running laundry
• Completing your last-minute grocery shopping
• Thawing your turkey, if it is frozen 
• Setting up for overnight guests

The Day Before Thanksgiving:

The day before you celebrate is the perfect time to prepare whatever food you can and to get your dining area ready.

• Cook cranberry relish/sauce
• Prepare side dishes that can be refrigerated and heated up or baked tomorrow
• Dry bread cubes for stuffing (if you are using fresh)
• Chop onions & other vegetables
• Prepare salad ingredients
• Pre-measure ingredients/spices for food you will prepare on Thursday
• Bake pies
• Thaw whipped topping
• Buy extra ice, if needed 
• Chill white wine/champagne/soft drinks 
• Set the table
• Empty trash and add extra bags to the bottom of your bins

Thanksgiving Day:

For Thanksgiving day, I suggest that you prepare a timeline. Families gather and eat at different times, so work backwards from whenever you want guests to be sitting down to eat.

• Get the turkey in the oven, allowing 20–30 minutes for it to rest before carving so the juices redistribute.
• Prepare side dishes, If you have limited oven space, prepare them in stages and keep them warm in a slow cooker or warming drawer.
• Set up the coffee and tea so all you have to do later is press “start.”
• Prepare and set out appetizers and drinks
• Assemble and dress the salad (you can do everything but the dressing and keep it in the refrigerator, covered with a damp paper towel).
• Uncork the wine
• While turkey is sitting, make the gravy and bake rolls (if applicable)
• Light candles
• Fill water glasses
• Take the “holiday photo” (I suggest doing this before the food is ready. Otherwise, food gets cold while you are taking photos.)
• Turn on your playlist of choice.
• Serve and relax! It’s nice to spark conversation around the table with questions like, “What are you most thankful for this year?” or “What’s your favorite Thanksgiving tradition?”

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Admittedly, every family celebrates Thanksgiving in their own way. Some people don’t even make turkey! Hosting a happy Thanksgiving is primarily about gathering, reflecting, sharing, and appreciating. With this in mind, I have a few additional thoughts to share:

Once Thanksgiving day arrives, enjoy it. Don’t sweat over food that gets burned or items that get spilled. Let go of perfectionism and focus on creating joyful memories with family and friends.

Don’t be afraid to delegate — most guests want to help, they just need direction. Assign simple tasks like filling glasses, dressing the salad, lighting candles, carrying dishes, or washing up.

It’s a thoughtful gesture to offer guests leftovers to take home. Consider stocking up on some affordable plastic storage containers that you don’t mind giving away.

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What tips do you have for hosting a happy Thanksgiving?